"Don't Tell Me What To Do!"

*** This blog entry does contain sexual content ***

So today I heard a news story on the radio that was staggering. The story went along and stated the Barna Group recently concluded a five-year study comprised of eight national studies, which was done on teenagers and young adults between the ages of 18 to 29. It found that nearly three out of every five young Christians (59%) disconnect from church life, either permanently or for a long period of time after the age of 15.

When asked a group of teens stated they liked the idea of being in community but were tired of being told what to do. Speaking from experiences I can see both ends of this statement very clearly. When we are told NOT to do something we inevitably want to do that thing it is we were told not to do (see Gen 2:17, 3:6-7). So we as Christians (me included) have at times not responded to others in the right way and have come across as condemning or self-righteous; and yes, I can see how this can be tiring to others. 

On the other hand, what is it exactly that you are “tired of being told not to do”? If a fellow Christian or someone you know walks with the Lord tells you something that can be found Biblically sound then could the issue be something that you should really stop and consider? For example, if a Pastor or a fellow Brother (or Sister) in Christ pulls you aside and out of love tells you, “Hey, I’ve noticed that you have an issue with anger (see Matthew 5:22),” and you take offense to this then your issue is with God’s word and not Christians “telling you what to do”.

Now let me be real again, there was a time for me from the ages of 22-27 (prior to my marriage) where I was living for no one but myself. I was a self-proclaimed womanizer, adulterer and fornicator. I had those around me that told me that I was living outside of God’s will and I was even aware what God’s word said about sexual immorality and fornication yet I self-willingly continued to have the proverbial “notch-on-my-bedpost” mentality.  I remember my attitude at that time towards all Christians/Church-goers/praying family members was, “don’t tell me how to live my life and don’t tell me what do.” I wanted to do what (and who) I wanted to do and whatever/whoever made me feel good. Just being real.

It was only by the grace of God that I escaped that sexual bondage somewhat unscathed.  Physically, God’s grace protected me when I was shall I say “unprotected” but I still deal mentally with many of these choices to this day. So when I think back now, I thank God that I had people in my life telling me, Biblically, what I should do and shouldn’t do (thanks Mom & Dad). 

God had (and still has) a plan for my life as well as yours. He knows best so His commandments aren’t lists of “dos and don’ts” but they’re there to help us avoid pain and issues that we shouldn’t have to deal with. He is basically saying, “Look, things will be a lot better for you on this earth if you don’t go around killing each other” [see Exodus 20:13 & Matthew 5:21-22]. His Word is also saying, “Sex? Yea, it is great and I created it and I want you to have sex; just not with every woman (or man) you see and not outside of my plan (marriage)" [see Exodus 20:14 & Matthew 5:27-28]. When I think about all the pain and anguish sex outside of marriage caused me this just makes way too much sense. We weren’t designed to handle much of the pain we bring upon ourselves and God knows that. This is why He gave us commandments and instructions in His word; it’s like GPS for navigating through life.

So just stop and ask yourself this question. What has doing things your way really brought you in your life up to this point? You’re out all night hoping to find someone that will love you (aka have sex with you), in and out of all the hot spots around town, but at the end of the night you end up home alone, drunk, and/or high knowing there has got to be more to life than this.  Be honest and answer that question to yourself, I bet the answer you come to could be life-changing if you allow it to be. 

Take Care & God Bless,

-E